On the Road

Still in Colson....

Day 2 - and don't get that excited ya'll - I'm not going to blog every day ok?

But yeah, today was another fantastic day of the internship. Woweewawa what a blessings to be part of something like this. Today we went deeper into the fear of the Lord, and how it truly is the basis of a huge part of the Christian life and walk. If you look at the fear of the Lord as a subject throughout the Bible, the promises are so abundant about the blessing that rests on those who fear God. I mean, to the extent that you begin to wonder 'Why would we ever do anything else but walk ever faithful before the Lord?'.

Maybe at somepoint soon I'll sit down and write a more in-depth thought process on what I'm thinking and learning with regards to this subject, but for now, I'm going to read a little more Charles Colson before bed!

Jeff, Beth, Elijah, and Carter arrived back today - it's great to see them again! Carter's gaining more and more personality every time I see him! Amazing!

"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding." -Proverbs 9v10

CA, HI, and Colson

Well, I'm finally here - as I type I'm sitting in the DTS office of the University of the Nations, YWAM's Kona campus. And you know what - it's great to be home!

I arrived in Hawaii yesterday afternoon, after spending a wonderful weekend in San Jose.... I stayed with a wonderful couple, Brad and Corey Schroer, who are dear friends of Jenni's. Brad has just begun a pastorship as a little church in San Jose, and it was a real privilege to be a part of their home for the few days I was there! Jenni and I got some much-needed hangtime, and I got some much-needed sleep after a couple of weeks of doing too much while getting ready to go!

Seriously though, Jenni and I had a wonderful time together, and it was difficult leaving yet again, although I'm so excited to have her coming out next week! Yes, for those of you who don't know, she's coming out to also staff DTS, and she arrives on Tuesday! What a blessing and answer to prayer!

It's great to be back in Hawaii. As I flew in over the mountains, with Maui poking it's peak up through the clouds, I was thanking the Lord for bringing me back. If I'm honest, it feels like I've come home - this is where my heart is, this is where I feel the Lord has led me, and it's so great to be back here and in the center of his will! From the deep wet heat which soaks your skin, to the flowers in the trees, to the flags on the poles denoting the countries represented here, to the beautiful pacific sunsets, it feels like my heart is at rest in a way it never was back in England. In a way it's sortof sad, but in a way, it's a beautiful thing, because I'm pursuing the Lord before all else that may have been laid before me.

So today I began the staff internship today, led by a young guy called John Morris, and his wife Elin. John is a 26year old Australian, and he's a total dude and man of God from what I've gathered in one day of classes. It's going to be a joy to go through the internship with him. The internship consists of intensive training on the fear of the Lord, group dynamics, dts staffing, and other things, coupled with times for reflection and meditation late in the afternoons and evenings. The goal is to train effective staff, who have the right worldview and vision to help lead others - the students - toward a deeper knowledge and experience of Jesus Christ. From what it looks like now, it's going to be an exciting three weeks!

Well, tonight I'm going to begin reading in my required reading book - "How Now Shall We Live" by Charles Colson. I have to read seven chapters by tomorrow night, in preparation for discussion on how worldview affects our lives as Christians. We only got it this morning. I love being here.

Much love.

Johnny

Jeff, this is for you!

My brother-in-law Jeff Reid is probably my most fiathful reader. In fact, he's so faithful that he continues to check my blog week after week, just to see if I've posted, even though I haven't posted in over 6 months!

Jeff, be encouraged. More is coming! The blog is being resurrected.

Post #100

Well supposedly this is my 100th post which is a pitifully small number considering the amount of time I've had a blog up and running! Oh well, at least there is something going out for you to read!

I'm sitting up late in Jeff and Beth's room at the YWAM university of the Nations in Kailua-Kona, Hawaii, listening to Sigur Ros, and it's definately time for a little bit of reflection. Ten minutes worth anyway!

It's been a stunning two-and-a-half months here at the Compassion DTS. Looking back, I don't feel like the same person who arrived here on September 26th. God has broken me down, and rebuilt many parts of me, and is now pouring himself back into those places. I was talking with Jeff tonight and it's exactly like a picture I feel the Lord gave me before I came here. In fact, I was praying about doing this DTS back in like March with Jeff, and this was the picture that was pretty much the confirming factor in my choice to come here.

I was standing in the throne room of God (I could tell you exactly what it looked like), and I saw God's hands holding my heart. It was a fleshy heart, but as he held it, he began to stretch it, and it fell lip in his hands like a balloon. Then, God began to pump his blood into it, through one of the open veins. As he pumped his blood in, my heart became full, and blood began to spurt out of the open arteries and spill onto the floor. The drops were dropping onto a map of the world, and as I watched the drops spread out to cover every continent on that map.

In looking back now, the first part of that dream has definately come to pass. God has stretched my heart to the MAX, leaving me totally limp at times. he's now pumped so much of himself back in, that it has to start spilling out! We'll see if it affects the whole world like I saw it do!

Love you all. Pray for me.

John

Thought for the night...

Holiness.

What is that?

Is it just the absence of sin?

No.

That's part of it.

Holiness is actually actively demonstrating the character of Yaweh.

So instead of simply trying to not sin, it's about living out the character of God.

Think on that. Wish I could explain it better but - it's late!

Love you all.

One for the fridge

Just thought I'd share a photo of me in Makapala with you all! Missing you all bunches!

PS see that awesome camera I'm holding? Someone on this DTS gave that to my teammate Tim with an awesome lens on it. Gave it. God is good. This is Tim.

Oh yeah and here's another good one. Basil and I took this after running across lava rock for 45 minutes in flip-flops with a flashlight to get to the lava. And we couldn't even get closer than about 250yds!

Laying it all down...

So yeah. This is the second to last week before we fly out to Mozambique. Once again, apologies for not blogging regularly enough to give you an accurate picture of DTS here.

Looking back though, I'm glad that I haven't blogged too much. This stage of DTS, lecture phase, has been an intensely personal time, along with the other 85-odd members of the school. There is definately a lot more I could have shared, but then there's a lot that's good left just between my heart and God's. Apologies aside, however, there is a lot that I would like to share with you, and I'm fairly sure the rest of my life will be part of that process. This DTS has been pretty amazing.

As I left England my prayer was “God, would you consume me?”. That question was in no way an idly spoken statement. It came from deep within my heart. God had been speaking to me in the month up to my departure about the true cost of following Him. I had a realization at a deeper level than ever before how the only offering of worth which I could lay on the altar as worship was EVERYTHING. Not just because he desires it, and that’s what my response should be, but what other response could express back to God just how grateful I am for all He’s done? What else could I bring before so faithful a Saviour?

What does it mean to be consumed? The website Dictionary.com states it this way:

con·sume /kənˈsum/ [kuhn-soom]

–verb (used with object)

1.	to destroy or expend by use; use up.

2.	to eat or drink up; devour.

3.	to destroy, as by decomposition or burning: Fire consumed the forest.

4.	to spend (money, time, etc.) wastefully.

5.	to absorb; engross: consumed with curiosity.

–verb (used without object)

6.	to undergo destruction; waste away.

7.	to use or use up consumer goods.

I often hear Christians ask God to consume them, but I don’t think there’s often a true realization of what that means. I know that I have said that to God, or similar things, and not truly grasped the depth of what that statement entails. But, this summer, more than ever before, I knew exactly what I was saying – “God, would you take all that I am, all my gifts, all my stuff, and use it, burn it, spend it; use it as fuel for your purpose and will – burn me up, until there’s nothing left”. When something is completely burned, all that’s left is the carbon shell of what it was. There is nothing of value left (Although carbon is the building block of diamonds – there’s a good analogy in that, treasure in heaven etc. – but that’s not the point).

I think God is taking me at my word.

I came here knowing God. I knew who he was. I knew him. I knew me. I knew my purpose in life. I knew a lot.

In this time I’ve found out how much I didn’t know. How much I was missing out on. I’ve found out who I truly am in Christ. I’ve found out the authority he’s vested in me. I’ve found out what it means to have Holy Spirit residing in me. The list is endless, but you get the point.

I’ve found out how much of me he requires. He’s beginning to ask for those things which I have offered him. The first week of DTS he asked me to lay down a big dream. He’s asked me to lay down money. Stuff. Security. Rights. Fears. Lies I’ve held to. People I’ve held to. Pride. God has been paring me down, exposing areas of me in which he wants control like never before. He’s taken me back to simple faith in him, while at the same time expanding my mind, heart, and soul with all that he is.

And this is not an idle process. This is for a purpose. On the 17^th of this month we fly out to a completely broken and hurting nation, hoping to bring not only the gospel, but the Kingdom of God to Mozambique. How in the world can we do that as a team if as individuals we’re still holding on to so much? How can I serve God for the rest of my life, living as I know he wants me to, in FULLNESS of who I am in Christ, if I haven’t sacrificed all to Him?

So I sacrificed it, laid it all on the altar, and now the Consuming Fire is doing his part. I’m being consumed. I have never experience such refinement. It isn’t very much fun in fact. But I know there is purpose in it!

We fly out to Mozambique in two weeks, knowing that we are nothing, that in our strength we will do nothing productive for the Kingdom, and so we cling to Christ. We cling to Him knowing that he is the only one who can possibly bring fulfillment of all that we dream of. We cling to him because he is the one who brought us freedom.

And we lay it all down saying “Consume us God, and let us be the fuel for your purpose. Let us burn scorching hot”. I wonder how long we’ll last?

Sic photo courtesy of Brandie Stanley. Many thanks. Click for the bigger view. You know you want to!

We have a phone!

So yeah,

We just got a student line at Makapala! The number is (001) 808-889-5805. Bear in mind that we're 10 hours behind you Brits right now, but I'd be stoked to hear from you guys! You'll almost definately not get me, but you'll probably get some other nice student so just ask for me!

I'd love to hear from England. Call me.

Love you all

John

All the lastest from DTS

Well, life here in Makapala is rolling on, and we're entering week 8 now I think? Unbelievable. The last few weeks have been both incredibly challenging and incredibly rewarding. I'll try to share a little with you all.

First off, the week starting October 30th (I think) was Holy Spirit week. We were SO blessed to have a lady called Maureen maynard come and speak to us. She knew Beth and Jeff from South Africa earlier this year, and she is Vice President of YWAM! Talk about bringing out the big guns. I was kindof thinking "wow this could be a volatile week", and it sure could of been but she made this incredible statement at the start of the week. She said something along the lines of: "Most of the Christian church agrees on 95% of the subject of the Holy Spirit, and disagrees, splits, etc., on the other 5%. I'm going to concentrate on the 95%". What a blessing! And what followed was a CRAZY week. Take for example a foundational part of teaching -  the Trinity. She went through just basic foundational stuff, looking at how each member of the Godhead has a mind and a will and is relational, and what their relationship looks like etc. Pretty mindblowing in and of itself. But then, when you look at things like SALVATION in the light of the character of the Trinity, it blows your mind to realized that you're welcomed into the very middle of that relationship. It changes the way you look at each other to realize that the Holy Spirit resides in each of you. It changes the way you look at your flesh and issues in your life, and it changes the way you look at your submission to God. It was an earth-shattering week. She spent about an hour talking about spiritual gifts, and that was so encouraging, but I loved the way Maureen kept us on the main issues - who the Holy Spirit is and what that means for us. Amazing.

Then week before last we had a team from a church in Tacoma, Washington come and teach to us about strongholds in our lives (basically how we give Satan authority to operate in areas of our lives, although we as a whole person are submitted to God). We looked at how this happens, what happens when this happens, and what should happen when we deal with them correctly, taking authority over these areas of our lives in the name of Jesus, repenting of our sin, and living differently, filling that place with the truth of God. It was also mindblowing. We also did some work on forgiveness, and realizing how unforgiveness in our lives can be a very powerful place for the enemy to gain a foothold in an area of our lives. I'd love to explain it to you better, but I don't want to type that much!

One other awesome thing they did was pray with each and every one of us, asking God to reveal to them what our personal original design was, i.e. what God created us to be (whether or not we were that already). I was skeptical at first, I have to admit, because I was kindof expecting them to be like "I see a picture of a rainbow, and God says he loves you" (not that there's anything necessarily wrong with that picture, but it's not exactly prophetic). Anyway, all my skepticism was BLOWN AWAY when we prayed and everything that I got was either something that I have been directly praying for in my life for a long time, or soemthing which I already felt I had received from the Lord about myself. I mean honestly, it was unbelievable. So that was both totally encouraging and challenging, because now I need to be living in that!

Ok, so last week we had Kevin Norris, who is the Kona base worship leader guy, come and speak to us about worship. Again, this could have been a kindof non-week, but not on this DTS! Kevin is 53, a family man, and totally on fire for God! He's also entirely down to earth, and not your average happy-clappy worship leader. He has a real depth of knowledge of God and an amazing logical brain. He took us DEEP into what is worship? is is the songs we sing? Are all the songs we sing worship? Can you worship with your whole life or is that statement technically wrong? One thing which I thought was an amazing challenge....

Dinnertime. Back later.

Internet in the Wilderness!

Dear wonderful friends and family!

I'm pleased to announce that on Saturday we had our bling satellite internet system installed - i can't even imagine how much that cost the University of the Nations but I guess it's all part of them bringing the Makapala site up to date, and boy are we thankful! We're getting pretty good use of it too...

So, ideally you can expect more mail and blogging happening from this end! We had our masquerade on Saturday night for a little bit of fun... I was Clyde (Bonnie and...). I'll try and get you all some photos soon!

Please be praying for me this week. We have a big decision in terms of whether or not we should go an an extended outreach to Uganda after our Mozambique outreach. I want to be wise and hear God's voice clearly on this. Please hold me up before God!

Love you all, talk to you soon. Going now to itch some of my bugbites.